Not everyone likes me. Why not, I wonder? What’s wrong with me?
Am I too old? Do younger mothers not feel connected to me?
Of course, I’m not one of life’s beautiful people.
Perhaps I don’t dress as I should.
Shouldn’t I have mentioned I’m Catholic?
Does everyone know about my bad days?
Have they found out about my past mistakes? And the ones I still make?
Perhaps I’m weird. I have too many strange opinions. I talk far too much.
Whatever the reason, it’s true: Not everyone likes me. I guess that’s natural. No one likes every person they ever meet. But I still have an inner need to be liked. I want people to approve of me. So I’m going to be very careful what I tell people.
I’m going to hide my age. I’ll only post young and beautiful photos. I won’t say anything about being Catholic. I’ll keep my bad days to myself. Oh, and I certainly won’t mention my mistakes. I’ll avoid certain topics of conversation. I’ll be careful what I blog about. I won’t show you what I’m wearing. My bad habits? You’ll never know I have any. I’ll smile and be pleasant and keep slightly at a distance… just in case.
And everyone will like me. I’ll have loads of friends. I’ll be enormously popular. People will want to be just like me.
Yes, I’m going to keep pretending I’m a perfect unschooling mother (a beautiful, trendy, young one, of course).
What’s that? It’s too late? I’ve already told you about my bad days and past mistakes? You can see I’m getting old? You’ve already worked out I’m weird?
I sigh with relief. I relax. Pretending can be such hard work.
Not everyone likes me. I guess I can live with that. It’s quite okay.