Forcing Kids to Learn and to Eat, and Should We Test Them?

“What shall I speak about in this week’s podcast?” I ask my daughters. “What are you thinking about at the moment?” asks Imogen. “Next week’s homeschool registration visit. Perhaps I’ll start with that and see where it leads.” And this…

Why I Am My Children’s Number One Fan

“You have such good children!” says a woman as we come out of the church. My children smile. They glow with happiness. And then I spoil it all by saying rather hurriedly, “They’re not always this good, you know!” I…

Confident to Be Me

8Love and acceptance are so very important. They give our kids the confidence to go out into the world and be themselves. This post was written by my daughter Imogen. It’s easy to recognize the Elvis Gang when we’re on…

Unschooling Children, a School Teacher Father, and Tea

“What does your husband think about you unschooling your children?”  I have been asked this question quite a few times. I guess people are interested in the answer because my husband Andy is a school teacher, as well as an…

Latest

Stories of Awful Hair Styles and Inspector Morse

I’ve been watching Inspector Morse, an old TV series, starring John Thaw. My dad was a great Morse fan. I contributed to his Morse DVD collection, buying him a new series for some of his birthdays. I knew my dad enjoyed this crime series but never wondered what exactly it was that attracted him to it. It didn’t occur to me to find out. I failed to say, “Hey, Dad, what is it about Morse that you like?” Months after…

When We Don’t Know What to Do

I’ve just updated my blog. I started at the first post I ever wrote and then worked my way through 14 years of stories, reading each one before deciding whether to keep it or revert it to draft. I then checked the formatting of the retained posts, rearranging paragraphs, eliminating dead links, and changing or improving the images. As I worked on my blog, rereading the posts, I slowly moved forward in time. When I created this blog, my youngest…

Intuition and Independence: Unschooling Tips and Practical Advice

What do we do if a child refuses to brush her teeth? What if our kids choose not to wash their hair or shower their bodies? Personal hygiene is important, isn’t it? Without self care, our kids might develop cavities. They could end up not being accepted by other people. Should we insist our children bring their own dirty cups back to the kitchen? If we don’t, will they fail to learn responsibility and consideration? Will they become self-centred and…

Unconditional Love: the Glue that Sticks Us Together

I miss my Mother's Day breakfast. My husband, Andy, and some of our adult kids enjoy coffee and pastries after the early Sunday Mass without me. I’m at home, a blanket drawn up to my chin with razor blades scratching my throat and a drum beating in my head: I’m unwell. Mother's Days, like birthdays, can be full of expectations. We don’t expect to be sick. We want all our kids to remember us. Will they visit? Will they phone?…

A Birthday Chat

Every time I celebrate a birthday, going up a number, I ponder ageing anew. How do I feel about getting older? Am I reluctant to admit my age? Or am I grateful to be who I am at the age I’ve reached? I once saw a sign saying, Experienced cars for sale. Of course, this is a novel way of selling secondhand vehicles. Secondhand conjures up images of something that’s not as good as it used to be. The value…

Live a Radical Life of Unconditional Love

Cecilie and Jesper Conrad invited me to be part of their Self Directed podcast, so I met them online, via Zoom, and I had a fabulous time recording episode 65 with them. After the interview, one of my daughters said, “How did it go, Mum?” and I replied, “I must have done okay because the Conrads have invited me to record a second episode with them!” That second conversation, episode 66 –  I’ve got back-to-back episodes on the Self Directed…

Encouraging My Daughters and Other Women by Embracing My Age

I was 58 on Christmas Day, 2019. If you do some real-life maths, you’ll soon work out how old I am today. There have been times when I haven’t wanted to admit my age and wished to appear younger than I am. Why? Did I fear no one would like me if they heard I was older than they were? Perhaps I thought I had to be young to be accepted and valued. But, bit by bit, I’ve come to…

An Unschool Conversation with Jesper and Cecilie Conrad on the Self Directed Podcast

Remember how I was talking about pushing ourselves to do things outside our comfort zones? Well, I almost said no the first time someone invited me to discuss unschooling on their podcast because I didn’t want to put myself in an unfamiliar and possibly uncomfortable situation. I was confident talking about unschooling when recording my own podcasts: I was in control. I could stop, delete, and start again if the words didn’t flow. But what would happen if I had…
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My Unschooling Books

Parents and Kids

The Ladies Fixing the World

Unschooling: Trust, Autonomy, and The Realities of Learning

The Ladies are Fixing the World again! Cecilie, Sandra and I are discussing the words ‘self-regulation’ and ‘limits’. When we say, “I’ve let go of control, and now I’m waiting for my child to learn how to regulate his time playing video games (for example),” do we have expectations about what that regulation should look like? Do we want…

How Unschooling Doesn’t Guarantee a Fairytale Life

Yesterday evening, like all Sunday evenings, my kids who live locally came to dinner. Six of us gathered around our dining room table, savouring a meal cooked by my husband while enjoying the usual end-of-the-week lively catch-up conversation. There was a time when we dreamed that all our children would buy houses on the same street as our family home.…

Resources for Unschoolers

Strolling towards the shopping centre, I spy an older man with three hand-reared brightly coloured parrots. A few wide-eyed kids are gathered around him, and as I watch, he transfers a parrot to one of their shoulders, where it bounces lightly upon its feet, nuzzling a little ear. The child grins, hardly daring to move. The children have questions which…

Christian unschooling

The Discomfort of Letting Go and Allowing Our Kids (and Ourselves) to Grow

We organise life so we’re not challenged too much. We don’t want to stray outside our comfort zone because that could be painful. We say no instead of yes to our kids, not wanting them to go to parties at night, ride their bikes on the road, run through the bush alone, or learn to drive. We don’t want thoughts…

Letting Go of Control

On Saturday evening, Jessie, Quinn’s sister, died. My son Callum’s Shar Pei/Great Dane puppy was bitten by a 2-metre-long brown snake. Her death wasn’t in The Plan. She should have lived for years. Instead, the Jessie stories have suddenly come to an end. There’ll be no more comparisons: “Is Jessie much bigger than Quinn? Send us a photo!” No more…
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