When We Don’t Know What to Do
I’ve just updated my blog. I started at the first post I ever wrote and then worked my way through 14 years of stories, reading each one before deciding whether to keep it or revert it to draft. I then…
What a Day Without Rules Looks Like
My children said, “Sleep in tomorrow, Mum. You’re overtired. You haven’t had much sleep in the last 48 hours.” So I slept in. When I got up, the kitchen was deserted. Everyone had had breakfast, washed the dishes, cleaned up,…
Is Unconditional Love at the Heart of Unschooling?
Recently, while travelling to town with two of my daughters, we talked about unschooling and how it’s impossible to say to another family, “Unschool in the same way as us.” Each family is different. Kids have their unique needs based…
Unschooling During a Crisis
Are there some things you hate doing? We don’t like gardening. Usually, we let our garden take care of itself. That’s why our hedges grew and grew until they were higher than the roof of our house. We should have…
One-on-One Times: Are They Important?
I got up early this morning. The house was quiet until our three cats, and one dog saw me. Meows and pitiful whines accompanied me to the kitchen. Apparently, our animals were on the edge of starvation. It’s just as…
Reluctant Spouse: Unschool Bits and Pieces
Reluctant Spouse What does my husband Andy think of unschooling? Was he always in favour of it? Or did I have to convince him that unschooling is the right thing to do? Parents frequently ask me these questions especially when their spouses or partners don’t like the idea of unschooling. So was Andy always supportive of unschooling? Yes, but he didn’t realise we were unschooling. I didn’t either. We lived this way of life for a long time before it…
Unschoolers Talk About Freedom to Choose
“If children are given the freedom to do whatever they want, will they choose to do nothing at all?” I ask my daughters. Sophie smiles and says, “It’s not possible to do nothing.” “But I’ve heard parents say to their kids, ‘You’ve done nothing today!’” I insist. Imogen joins the conversation: “Perhaps parents don’t value whatever the child has been doing. To them, it’s ‘nothing’. It doesn’t count.” I ask my girls what they choose to do with their time.…
Is it Really Okay if Kids Play All Day?
Parents value play when children are very young. At this stage of life, we all agree that children should be playing. But what about when they get older? Should they still be allowed to play as much as they would like? When children reach an age when they could go to school, play is often pushed to one side. It no longer holds the centre position in children’s lives. It’s now time for more serious things like learning about maths and…
Parent and Friend: Unschool Bits and Pieces
Parent and Friend A lot of people say our kids need us to be their parent and not their friend. “There’ll be plenty of time to be friends when they are grown up.” But why waste all those years when we could have been friends? My teenage daughter Sophie says if we want to be good friends with our older children, we have to start when they are young. “Parents can’t just turn around and say, ‘Now you’re an adult,…
Unschoolers Earning Money, Following Passions
How can unschooling kids keep following their passions once they get to an age where they need to earn money to support themselves? Some unschoolers step straight into a career based on their interests Some might decide to get a job in a completely different field and continue following their interests in their spare time Others will find a job that will earn them money while they keep working on their passions. They hope that eventually, they can give up…
What if Unschoolers Don’t Know How to Write Essays?
What if unschoolers don’t know how to write essays? Will they be at a disadvantage if they want to go to university? This post follows on from How an Unschooler Learns to Write. My daughter Imogen taught herself to write. After learning the basics, she read widely, observing the example of good authors. She experimented with different styles and techniques. She wrote and wrote and wrote. I wasn’t surprised when Imogen announced she wanted to study writing at tertiary level.…
How an Unschooler Learns to Write
My daughter Imogen loves writing. It’s part of who she is. “When did you start writing?” I ask. “I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t writing.” My fourth child was writing stories long before she knew how to form letters into words. “Do you remember how Charlotte and I would sit side by side at the kitchen table and draw our stories?” says Imogen. “We’d chat about what was happening in the story and then draw it. Then we’d chat…
Adding Joy: Unschool Bits and Pieces
Adding Joy to an Unschooling Day Not so long ago, a mother told me she only arranges special outings for ice cream or coffee or lunch with her kids as a reward. They can earn special time with her by working hard at their school work. I feel sad that the special moments of life seem to be rationed out. (And learning is done for rewards and not out of love.) Maybe some people think that I’m spoiling my kids…
Connecting Unschooling and Ageing
I’m lying on my bed thinking about ageing when my daughter Sophie appears. “I thought I’d come and have a chat with you before…
Is It Wrong to Love Without Limits?
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.…
Respecting Kids and Christmas Presents
Does having a simple Christmas sound good? It does to me. This year, like last year and the one before, I wanted to announce…
Learning to Read and Trusting Unschooling
It is absolutely essential that we are curious people who are excited about the possibilities in life. The atmosphere in our homes gets picked up by our kids so they think it’s normal to learn, to be curious, to follow thoughts and ideas and try things out… I was battling with my kids for a while. They kept saying, ‘Why…
Unschooling: Trusting the Process and Letting Go of Control
“I kind of love my title for this podcast. It’s very ambitious. Let’s fix it all!” And so begins another Ladies Fixing the World conversation in which Cecilie Conrad, Sandra Dodd and I dive deep into unschooling, sharing our thoughts and experiences. In S2E4, we discuss Unschooling: Trusting the Process and Letting Go. Want to know more…
How Unschoolers Can Deal with Questions and Sceptics
My mother-in-law visited us for the birth of our son, Thomas. After he died and we’d buried him in his tiny white casket, Andy’s mother asked me if we wanted more children. As I replied, “Oh, yes!”, my mother-in-law’s face dropped into a disapproving frown. “She thinks we already have enough kids,” I thought as my defence hackles rose. But…
Unschooling, Homemaking, and a Mother’s Role
Erin wrote: What does the idea of homemaking mean to you? Is it a certain skill set or talent? Does it need to look or happen a certain way, or is it a flexible term? What role does homemaking play for you in home ed life? Do the two need to go together? Are there aspects of homemaking that you…
Unschooling and Trust
I have been struggling with this post for a while now, and wondering why I’m having so much trouble finding the right words. And I have decided it’s the language. I want to write a story from a personal point of view like I normally do. And I can’t. We had such a gradual transition to unschooling, I didn’t really…