The End of the Story

Those thrilling words: no events today.

An empty Saturday stretches ahead. What will I do?

What would I like to do? What should I do? Sometimes the two don’t match. We need to choose one over the other. That’s where I am today.

I need to finish building my new website. Only a few people know that I have big plans for this blog. Most readers probably think I’ve been neglecting it, sliding away, nothing more to say, no more stories.

But that’s not the way it is.

A while ago, I lost access to my blog for two weeks. This problem, only one in a long line of problems, pushed me over the edge. I had to do something. Should I move my blog away from WordPress or delete it?

A kind friend saved my blog from extinction. When I was frustrated, no longer caring, just wanting the problem to disappear, she sent me an encouraging message and a donation to keep my blog online.

So, I opened a Squarespace account and began work on a new-look blog. I exported my posts from this site to the new one. I was excited—a new beginning. Then I realised that all my blog photos and post formatting had disappeared during the transfer. Almost 900 muddled stories without images. It will take a lot of work to sort everything out.

So, I sit at my computer, formatting blog posts. I sit here day after day on my swivel chair in my studio, except for the days when it all feels too much and I need a break. I rearrange paragraphs and add photos.

And I let my mind wander back through the years as I read old stories.

I wonder about unschooling. Is it really the message that I still want to share?

I think of the mother I was years ago when I began writing online and the one I am now. I remember the dreams my family had and where I thought my kids would end up. I think about now and how things actually are. And I ponder the way ahead.

Our stories are still being written. They won’t end until the very last day.

But I hope building my website will soon come to an end. I want to hit ‘publish’ and send my new website into the world. When I do that, with a sigh of relief, my domain name will transfer from this blog to the new one. Readers will still be able to find me at this address. I’m not sure if my subscriptions will transfer. Hopefully, they will, but if you don’t hear from me for a long time, please visit my blog and subscribe again.

I received a couple of totally unexpected Buy Me a Coffee donations this week. Thank you! These generous readers, like my kind friend, encourage me to keep working. Soon, thanks to my supporters, I’ll have a new place to share stories, ideas, and encouragement, a place I hope you’ll be a part of.

So, I modify my calendar. I change no events today to format blog posts, an all-day event.

As I import photos and rearrange words, I immerse myself in the past. I revisit the joy, the ideas that developed over the years, the hopes and dreams, and the difficult days. And I feel grateful for all that I’ve experienced, the love, the joy, and even the problems that taught me so much.

I have great hope for how the story will end.