How Both Unschooling Parents and Kids Can Do Amazing Things

What am I going to do next? What are my plans? What’s ahead for me? Someone at the Canberra unschooling meeting wanted to know what I’d like to do now that I’ve published my unschooling books. Will I write more books? Perhaps I’ll take up a new challenge?

I was happily surprised by the questions. Normally, when I get together with other parents, the conversation revolves solely around our children. But it shouldn’t. Parents’ hopes and dreams and interests are important too, aren’t they?

Our youngest child is 15 so for us there aren’t many official homeschooling years left. Not so long ago, this prompted someone to remark that soon I will be free. It will be my turn. At last, I’ll have a chance to make something of my life. Maybe that person thinks I’ve been putting my life on hold while I’ve been bringing up my children. But that’s not true. I’ve been living my life to the full!

Unschooling isn’t just about children. It’s about parents as well. Parents are still learning. We’re doing unexpected things. Amazing things. Like writing books and blogging and podcasting. We’re doing things that used to frighten us like vlogging and being interviewed. We’re developing our talents. We’re growing. Together with our children, we are striving to become the people we are meant to be.

So what’s ahead for me? Something unexpected? Something I can’t imagine right at this moment? Whatever I do, I hope it’s something that will make a difference.

If you’re at the beginning of your unschooling journey, be prepared for an adventure. Your kids are going to do amazing things. And so are you. You’re going to face challenges. Some of them will be difficult. But you will learn and grow. You’re going to go places you can’t imagine. Doesn’t that sound exciting?

Something Extra

Here’s a story about doing amazing things. It’s from my book Curious Unschoolers.

What if My Child Is Ordinary?

Occasionally, I receive an email that goes something like this:

Sue, 

I’ve been reading your blog and enjoying your stories about your daughters. They are doing some amazing things. I can see that unschooling is working for you. But will it work for my family? You see, I have ordinary children. They’re not musical like yours. They don’t write. They don’t draw. In fact, they don’t seem to have any particular talents.

Will all unschoolers do amazing things? If you do some googling, you’ll find many stories of young unschoolers doing extraordinary things. You might think that every unschooler has a guaranteed, amazing future. But what if it doesn’t turn out that way for your kids? Will you think you have failed? Will you wonder if you did something wrong?

I have a few unschooled children who are hoping to do amazing things. In particular, my daughters Imogen and Sophie have big dreams. Imogen is a passionate singer and pianist and writer. Sophie would like to use her passions of photography and videography to share her love of fitness and health via YouTube and books and exercise programs. My daughters are working on these dreams. And who knows? One day maybe someone will look at them and say, “Unschoolers do amazing things!”

But I don’t think unschooling necessarily means that our kids are going to become famous singers or young entrepreneurs or international sports stars or bestseller authors or big-name fashion designers with their own line of clothing. Some unschoolers are going to have more ordinary-looking lives. However, they are still going to do amazing things as they make their mark on the world. They’re just going to do it in a quiet way.

Not all my children are doing visibly extraordinary things. For example, my eldest son has an ‘average’ type of job. He isn’t making big waves. But this doesn’t mean he isn’t amazing. No, I think he is a very special person indeed. I say to him, “Go out there and make a difference!” And he does. He uses the talents he has been given to change the lives of all the people he comes into contact with.

I think it’s important that we tell our less showy kids that they are amazing, that they have talents, that they’re making a difference to the world. Sometimes they might compare themselves to other people who are getting more attention than them. Do they feel they’re rather ordinary? Perhaps they think they aren’t doing anything of importance. We might need to remind them that they are indeed unique people with a unique mission.

Sometimes parents might not feel very amazing either. We look around and compare ourselves to others, especially to those who are working in a similar field to us and say, “There are far more talented and successful people out there than me. Why should I bother?” We give up. But we shouldn’t because, like our kids, we are unique human beings. Each of us has special talents. We each have a voice, unlike anyone else’s, and we should use it. How else are we going to change the world? And how else are we going to encourage our kids to do the same?

So I’m always saying to my family, “Go out there and make a difference!” It doesn’t matter if they are cantoring the psalm on Sundays, performing on a stage, teaching a classroom of children, listening to someone, or even washing the dishes, I say those words. I remind them that we can do everything in such a way that our efforts make a difference to the people around us and to the world we live in.

But what if we’re still not convinced that our child is special? If we’re having trouble seeing how extraordinary our children are, perhaps we’re not looking at them in the right way. Could it be that we haven’t yet let go of our own ideas and expectations?

Should we worry if our children appear to be ordinary? Oh no, because they’re not!

Photos

Some more photos of our weekend trip to Canberra! The first one shows me and Imogen returning to our cabin after a deliciously wonderful buffet breakfast. The second one is of us trying to work out how to use the parking ticket machine outside the National Museum of Australia. We don’t have to pay for our parking where we live so this was a new learning experience!

So, what do you think? Is it important that parents have interests, hopes and dreams? Do you have dreams? And what about parking ticket machines? Do you have any of those where you live?