How Our Unschooling Lives and Kids Don’t Need to be Picture-Perfect
I decided to say goodbye to my Stories of an Unschooling Family blog. After over a dozen years of writing and speaking about unschooling, it was time for new adventures.
But then, one day, I had an idea: even though I no longer wanted to blog about unschooling, perhaps I could stay in touch with the unschooling community on Instagram. What if I continued to post photos or reels with short, unschooling stories? And maybe I could use IG to promote some of the posts in my blog’s archive.
So, for a few weeks, I created an IG post with a photo or reel and an unschooling thought or idea almost every day. And while I was doing that, I scrolled through my endless feed and joined in with a few conversations, and before I knew it, unschooling had taken over my life again.
I soon felt overwhelmed by all the noise on social media. I started comparing myself to the younger, more vibrant unschooling influencers who had thousands of followers, unlike me. I wondered: what was I doing wrong? Why weren’t my posts getting hundreds of likes? How could I persuade people to follow me? How could I be successful on Instagram?
I researched and read articles like How I Gained a Million Instagram Followers in Only One Day and One Billion Fabulous Ideas for Instagram Stories That Will Keep Your Followers Coming Back for More. I thought about my ‘brand’. Should I change my image? Am I too old? Maybe I need to be more upbeat and trendy. Should I adopt a new ‘voice’? How about a new name?
And then I stopped and said, “Sue, don’t be ridiculous. You’re you, and that’s okay.”
I also admitted, yet again – I keep trying to convince myself otherwise – I don’t like social media. I hate the transient nature of it, how I have to think of new ways to produce more attention-grabbing content to replace yesterday’s offering that has already passed through everyone’s feeds, never to be seen again.
I also don’t want to feel discouraged when I compare my life and what I’m doing to someone else’s.
That’s a problem, isn’t it? Sometimes other people’s lives are inspiring, but often they make us think, “What’s wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? Why aren’t my kids perfect like those in that family? Unschooling might suit other families, but it’s not working for us.”
Comparisons and discouragement can make us feel like running away.
I ran away from social media. Yes, I’ve deleted my IG account. I no longer want to jump up and down, adding to the noise, trying to get everyone’s attention as I promote myself. I’ve given up, or maybe I’m rebelling, refusing to play the game.
No social media probably means I will fade away despite the reassurances I received when I googled Do I need Social Media to Promote My Blog… Books? Soon no one will know who I am and what I’m doing. But I’m okay with that. I want to live my life my way and not be tied to a system that makes me unhappy.
So, I’m no longer on social media, but I’m still here on my blog, republishing old stories in new ways. And that might be surprising because, as I said at the beginning of this post, I did try to say goodbye. I never intended coming back. But I should have known I couldn’t stay away forever. I’ve attempted to let go of my blog without success many times before.
Why do I fail each time? Why do I keep looking over my shoulder instead of moving on without a second glance? I think the answer has a lot to do with love.
I can’t stop saying, “Try not to worry about giving your kids a perfect upbringing and education. It doesn’t matter if you have bad days or your unschooling kids aren’t poster perfect. Just keep unschooling. Keep loving unconditionally. With love, everything will be okay.”
I never get tired of sharing the message of unconditional love.
A Message We Can All Share Even if Our Unschooling Lives Aren’t Picture-Perfect.
Today’s archive posts are about imperfect unschooling lives, kids and unconditional love. I’m sharing two stories and a podcast.
From the story, A Message We Can All Share Even if Our Unschooling Lives Aren’t Picture-Perfect:
But what if our family is going through a difficult time? What if we think our kids aren’t perfect examples of unschooling? Will we feel uneasy sharing our stories? Will we wish our kids were different because they don’t match up to the unschooling vision we think we should be presenting to the world? Perhaps we’ll want to creep away from the public eye or avoid discussing unschooling with our extended family because someone might say:
‘Unschooling obviously doesn’t work. Why do you do it?’
‘What do you know about unschooling? You’re not doing a great job living this way of life.’
Unschooling Poster Kids
From the story, Unschooling Poster Kids:
…are there things other than money that we should be thinking about when we consider the homeschooling and parenting options?
Do we want to bring up kids who know they’re okay because we’ve accepted them for who they are? Do we want them to pursue work that’s important to them and brings them joy? Would we like our children to live purposeful lives, doing what they think God wants them to do?
Would we like our kids to feel unconditionally loved and then love in return?
Social Media, Hooks, Dustractions, and Books
From the podcast post, Social Media, Hooks, Distractions, and Books:
Yes, there are benefits to using social media. But could there also be risks? What about our privacy? Are platforms such as Instagram and Facebook using us? Are they influencing our behaviour?
In this week’s podcast, episode 185, Imogen and I are discussing social media: do we need it? Is it a distraction? Can we break the hooks that FB and IG use to pull us in?
Photos
It’s wattle season again! Did you know there are over 1000 species of wattle in Australia? On every day of the year, there is a golden wattle blooming somewhere in our country. At the moment, we have at least three types of wattle lighting up the bush close to our home, making it picture-perfect!
So, what do you think?
Do you ever get discouraged by what you see on social media? Do you ever wish your kids were poster-perfect because it’s hard dealing with the criticism of those around you? I wonder if anyone else is attempting to live a quiet life without any social media at all.