Losing Time
I’ve been reading a book called A Time to Die by Nicholas Diat, who visited eight monasteries to talk to the monks about the experience of death. Here’s something that caught my attention: One monk described how he cares for…
What a Day Without Rules Looks Like
My children said, “Sleep in tomorrow, Mum. You’re overtired. You haven’t had much sleep in the last 48 hours.” So I slept in. When I got up, the kitchen was deserted. Everyone had had breakfast, washed the dishes, cleaned up,…
Thankful and Facing Facts
I’m very pleased to announce that Venisa McAllister is my guest podcaster for this week’s episode: Thankful and Facing Facts. Thankful Venisa is talking about: Her own educational and childhood experiences How her family moved from homeschooling to unschooling Her children…
This Time Next Year: Where Will You Be?
Do you ever play the game, ‘this time last year…’? What about ‘this time next year…’? How does it feel looking back? What do you hope for the future? Several days ago, my very thoughtful phone made me a video…
Put on Your Real-Life Maths Eyes
Lying awake in bed last night, I did some real-life maths: how long was it before I had to get up for Mass? As the sleepless hours ticked by, the answer to that question became smaller and smaller. After I…
Reluctant Spouse: Unschool Bits and Pieces
Reluctant Spouse What does my husband Andy think of unschooling? Was he always in favour of it? Or did I have to convince him that unschooling is the right thing to do? Parents frequently ask me these questions especially when their spouses or partners don’t like the idea of unschooling. So was Andy always supportive of unschooling? Yes, but he didn’t realise we were unschooling. I didn’t either. We lived this way of life for a long time before it…
Unschoolers Talk About Freedom to Choose
“If children are given the freedom to do whatever they want, will they choose to do nothing at all?” I ask my daughters. Sophie smiles and says, “It’s not possible to do nothing.” “But I’ve heard parents say to their kids, ‘You’ve done nothing today!’” I insist. Imogen joins the conversation: “Perhaps parents don’t value whatever the child has been doing. To them, it’s ‘nothing’. It doesn’t count.” I ask my girls what they choose to do with their time.…
Is it Really Okay if Kids Play All Day?
Parents value play when children are very young. At this stage of life, we all agree that children should be playing. But what about when they get older? Should they still be allowed to play as much as they would like? When children reach an age when they could go to school, play is often pushed to one side. It no longer holds the centre position in children’s lives. It’s now time for more serious things like learning about maths and…
Parent and Friend: Unschool Bits and Pieces
Parent and Friend A lot of people say our kids need us to be their parent and not their friend. “There’ll be plenty of time to be friends when they are grown up.” But why waste all those years when we could have been friends? My teenage daughter Sophie says if we want to be good friends with our older children, we have to start when they are young. “Parents can’t just turn around and say, ‘Now you’re an adult,…
Unschoolers Earning Money, Following Passions
How can unschooling kids keep following their passions once they get to an age where they need to earn money to support themselves? Some unschoolers step straight into a career based on their interests Some might decide to get a job in a completely different field and continue following their interests in their spare time Others will find a job that will earn them money while they keep working on their passions. They hope that eventually, they can give up…
What if Unschoolers Don’t Know How to Write Essays?
What if unschoolers don’t know how to write essays? Will they be at a disadvantage if they want to go to university? This post follows on from How an Unschooler Learns to Write. My daughter Imogen taught herself to write. After learning the basics, she read widely, observing the example of good authors. She experimented with different styles and techniques. She wrote and wrote and wrote. I wasn’t surprised when Imogen announced she wanted to study writing at tertiary level.…
How an Unschooler Learns to Write
My daughter Imogen loves writing. It’s part of who she is. “When did you start writing?” I ask. “I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t writing.” My fourth child was writing stories long before she knew how to form letters into words. “Do you remember how Charlotte and I would sit side by side at the kitchen table and draw our stories?” says Imogen. “We’d chat about what was happening in the story and then draw it. Then we’d chat…
Adding Joy: Unschool Bits and Pieces
Adding Joy to an Unschooling Day Not so long ago, a mother told me she only arranges special outings for ice cream or coffee or lunch with her kids as a reward. They can earn special time with her by working hard at their school work. I feel sad that the special moments of life seem to be rationed out. (And learning is done for rewards and not out of love.) Maybe some people think that I’m spoiling my kids…
Boy Stories
Usually I speak and write about my four youngest daughters. But not today. For this week’s podcast, I share some boy stories. I received…
Christian Unschooling: Should Parents Demand Obedience from Their Children?
Not so long ago, I was reading a spiritual book that mentioned monks and their life of poverty, chastity and obedience. And this got…
Unschooling: Learning the Important Things Before Time Runs Out
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Learning to Read and Trusting Unschooling
It is absolutely essential that we are curious people who are excited about the possibilities in life. The atmosphere in our homes gets picked up by our kids so they think it’s normal to learn, to be curious, to follow thoughts and ideas and try things out… I was battling with my kids for a while. They kept saying, ‘Why…
Unschooling: Coping With the Unexpected
I used to think I could control my life. To achieve a perfect life, all I had to do was organise everything well, including my kids. What is a perfect life? My perfect life vision included a graduated row of good-looking and well-behaved children. I wanted people to admire my family and home, saying, “Sue is such a good mother!…
How Unschoolers Can Deal with Questions and Sceptics
My mother-in-law visited us for the birth of our son, Thomas. After he died and we’d buried him in his tiny white casket, Andy’s mother asked me if we wanted more children. As I replied, “Oh, yes!”, my mother-in-law’s face dropped into a disapproving frown. “She thinks we already have enough kids,” I thought as my defence hackles rose. But…
About Me, About Being Different
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Is It Okay if Parents Want to Influence Their Unschooling Kids?
Is it okay if we try to influence our unschooling kids? What if we’d like them to acquire particular values? Can we expose them to our beliefs? Or should we stand back and try to keep quiet about the things we base our lives on and let our kids work out everything for themselves? Let’s say we decide it’s…