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Aiming for Love, Not Perfection

 I had a vision…  By the age of 18 all my children were going to be perfectly brought up and perfectly educated. I wanted them to fly off into the world without a problem. I was going to sit back and sigh with satisfaction and happiness. Pat myself on the back: A job well done.  In order to make my goal come true, I spent a lot of time looking for the perfect way of homeschooling, and stressing out over…

Nothing is More Important than Love

 “What would you rather do, play that computer game or come and give me a hug?” I ask my daughters.  Without a moment’s hesitation, Gemma-Rose says, “Hug you of course!”  “Do you even need to ask?” says Sophie.  I am humbled. What did I do to deserve such love?  I love my children so much it hurts.  “I love you so much,” I say.  My girls smile. “We know that!”  Maybe my children weren’t always aware of just how much…

When a Child Has Only One Interest.

“It’s all very well, letting children follow their own interests, but my daughter only wants to do one thing. She’s not interested in science or maths or writing… All she wants to do is cook and how’s that going to satisfy the educational authorities?” a hypothetical mother asks.  What would I do if one of my girls only wanted to cook, and wouldn’t consider learning anything else? I might try an idea I picked up at the very first homeschool…

Making Children Learn What They Don’t Want to Know

We can’t force knowledge into children if they aren’t interested, though it might appear we can. For, of course, children learn things they don’t want to learn all the time. Anyone who’s been to school is very aware of this. Bribes, punishments and even shame are used to ensure children learn things they’re not interested in. But is this kind of learning valuable? Or will children forget knowledge gained this way? Is it better to give ownership of learning to…

Falling in Love the Jane Austen Way

My older girls are busy introducing their younger sisters to the delights of Jane Austen. “You must watch Persuasion,” insists Imogen. “I’ll explain all the difficult bits,” she adds, as she notices the uncertain look on nine year old Gemma-Rose’s face. So we settle down on the sofa, the DVD is inserted into the machine and soon we are immersed in a past world of gentle romance. An hour and a half later, everyone sighs with satisfaction, even Gemma-Rose, who didn’t need any…

Watching History as it Happened

  Where were you the day Neil Armstrong walked on the moon? I am guessing a lot of people reading this weren’t even born then. But I was. I was a young primary school student at the time. Recently the girls and I were watching the DVD series, A Space Odyssey: Voyage to the Planets*. It is a fascinating docu-drama, telling the story of what could happen in the future, if humans ever develop the technology which will allow us…
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My Unschooling Books

Parents and Kids

Unschool Love Stories

About a month ago, I wrote the following story for my unschooling community: This morning, I didn’t want to go for a run. It…

The Ladies Fixing the World

Unschooling: Trust, Autonomy, and The Realities of Learning

The Ladies are Fixing the World again! Cecilie, Sandra and I are discussing the words ‘self-regulation’ and ‘limits’. When we say, “I’ve let go of control, and now I’m waiting for my child to learn how to regulate his time playing video games (for example),” do we have expectations about what that regulation should look like? Do we want…

Unschooling: Coping With the Unexpected

I used to think I could control my life. To achieve a perfect life, all I had to do was organise everything well, including my kids. What is a perfect life? My perfect life vision included a graduated row of good-looking and well-behaved children. I wanted people to admire my family and home, saying, “Sue is such a good mother!…

Unschooling: Trusting the Process and Letting Go of Control

“I kind of love my title for this podcast. It’s very ambitious. Let’s fix it all!” And so begins another Ladies Fixing the World conversation in which Cecilie Conrad, Sandra Dodd and I dive deep into unschooling, sharing our thoughts and experiences. In S2E4, we discuss Unschooling: Trusting the Process and Letting Go.   Want to know more…

Christian unschooling

The Discomfort of Letting Go and Allowing Our Kids (and Ourselves) to Grow

We organise life so we’re not challenged too much. We don’t want to stray outside our comfort zone because that could be painful. We say no instead of yes to our kids, not wanting them to go to parties at night, ride their bikes on the road, run through the bush alone, or learn to drive. We don’t want thoughts…

Pondering Trust

I never wanted to be in a position where I had to trust God. I preferred to rely on my own resources. I wanted to be totally in control of my own life. That seemed easier to do because trusting is so very difficult. Or so it can seem. Then one day, at a time when I was feeling rather…
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